I figure my first blog would be painting a complete picture of who I am. I aim to give you all cringe worthy pictures of myself and the phases of life I've had. That way I hope to distinguish myself from other InFluEnCeRs(I really hate that term, who the hell are you really influencing anyways..) that I am just as much as a human as you, perfectly imperfect.
Growing up, I was always bullied and made fun of. It was my norm to be bagged on, be put down constantly and even physically beat up a couple of times. Being an adolescent was tough let me tell you. All I really wanted to do was to fit in, be cool, chase girls and fulfill my Asian parents' undying wishes to go to college. Definitely trying to transcend Erik Erikson's stages of development you know?
You could even make the assumption that I grew up with a low sense of self-worth, lack of confidence and respect for myself. We could even dive deeper into my upbringing and deduce how I felt like I was never enough with everyone around me but that's for another post.
"It's not a phase mom." - 15 year old Joseph, your typical angsty teenager.
I got really sick and tired of being trampled over so OBVIOUSLY the answer was to get bigger and look stronger. Then in my sophomore year of high school, I decided to take up weight training as my physical education. I learned how to use everything but the squat rack adequately enough(surprise surprise...)
Fast forward a year into the end of my junior year and now check out this sick ass physique:
Being a fake Abercrombie model at the time was the trollest thing a high schooler could do.
It's interesting what working out does for you physically, mentally, and emotionally. I instantly had the respect and attention I so desperately needed for my 16 year old self. Seriously, check out those pecs tho. They were ahead of its time. I started feeling much better about who I was as a person. This is why I think it's so important to be active and stay active, even if it's not lifting weights.
This is me at 18, the summer before I started college. I haven't tracked macros yet but thought I was given golden nuggets of information at my LA Fitness from other "jacked" dudes. I didn't skip any days and if it was leg day, I did more upper body tings instead. This Joseph began training like a bro because you know what, bros commanded respect in the gym.
Arms looking real juicy there buddy. Abs are coming in nicely too. Must be because I did arms and abs 3x/week to replace leg days. Seriously, who looks at legs?
For the next 4 years of nursing school, I met like-minded individuals and we would all train together either at my school's pathetic gym or at the newly opened 24 hour fitness down in Santa Monica. After I had my first heartbreak, I did what any other 19 year old guy would do: go harder in the gym. It wasn't until I saw the physiques of the two dudes on the right and asked them how they got shredded. They told me to focus on my diet and so I did.
I did Hawaiian/Polynesian dancing back in nursing school. This picture was taken before we did the Bahag dance. We all had to wear man-thongs because #cultureappreciation. Yes there were a lot of Filipinos. Yes I blend in well. To this day, I still have Titas who speak Tagalog to me though I can't understand a single word.
During college I also got into the festival scene. I feel like we all get into this phase and generally don't stop until maybe a few years after undergrad. My first rave was EDC 2013 and after srs mirin of some of the shirtless, I was even more committed to have an awesome physique. I instantly fell in love with the festival scene and participated heavily in it for the next 5 years. Enter: Fuckboi Joseph 2013 - 2018.
150 lbs of douchery.
I never saw my abs growing up. I also realized it was quite easy for me to both gain and lose weight. This was made apparent once I started using MyFitnessPal and began understanding macros and dieting. I was still running bro splits because I really thought at the time BCAAs and arm day every was the answer. I even went so far as to eat less than 100g of carbs a day which granted me the physique seen below. There was a phase in fitness where carbs was the absolute enemy and that you had to eat chicken breast and broccoli with a side of ice cubes in order to look shredded. I still had my once a week cheat days where I ate everything and anything. Looking back, if I didn't starve myself and actually ate some carbs I think my weight gain post cheat days wouldn't be so drastic. Your boy was still skipping leg day because when you're inebriated, nobody looks at your legs. The first time you see your abs is one of the best feelings in the world. It's like unlocking a new found level of confidence.
133 lbs of Fuckboi brah. All I cared about was going to festivals and getting albeit questionable attention. Who cares if she's rolling tits. She wants to wash her clothes with your abs! Rave is love, rave is life.
Eventually I got into the debauchery and supplements that were used in festivals. This had me fall into a deeper rabbit hole with the scene. Not surprisingly, I've dated quite a bit of ABGs and this archetype of Asians has been my particular favorite. A few more heartbreaks with ABGs and several festivals later I graduated nursing school. My new found confidence gave me all the external validation I needed to believe that I mattered to people.
Fun fact: I was .01 away from Suma Cum Laude. Not that it really matters in the clinical setting because the best nurses are the ones who are great with people.I'm looking at all of you aspiring nurses out there. Your grades don't mean shit. Prioritize your soft skills and patient care!
RN BSN af.
Around this time, I found out about Jeff Nippard and Team 3DMJ. I then switched my bro splits into upper/lower splits. I've been running this ever since. Still diligently tracking macros because #shredz
Now that I had disposable income, I lived out my festival dreams. I went deeper into using supplements for each festival/club event I attended. I went to every SoCal festival, EDCs, and Ultra twice. Mentally I wasn't happy with my life, myself, and being on 8 hour night shifts. The only things that made me feel actually happy was going to events and working out.
My first Ultra in 2016. I sprained my ankle on day 2 at the Chainsmokers, hobbled a few miles to our rendezvous point to then be driven back home to our AirBnb. Crazy how much supplements helped numb the pain. I sat out on day 3 because I couldn't walk on it. I still think that was their best year.
I was about the HDYnation life. I'm THAT GUY.
EDC 2016. Probably the peak of my raving career. 4 years back to back. I eventually did another year after this but it wasn't the same so I stopped going altogether.
I think I was raved out in 2016. I was also dating someone at the time who was and still probably is super heavy in the scene. Festivals? Check. Night clubs? Bet. Vegas trips? Say no more. It got so bad that I would crave going somewhere and use it as an excuse to be inebriated. I didn't think it was an issue since my girlfriend at the time was going just as hard. My brain and body eventually sat me down and had an intervention with me. "Bro, you have a problem, you need to stop." 6 months of debauchery was more than my brain cells could take. On one special occasion when I decided to induce some psychosis in myself because well, why not, I asked myself, "is this how I'm going to be spending the rest of my life," to which the voice in my head said, "no you're not."
People claim that it isn't smart to listen to yourself when under the influence. They're right, except this time. I eventually ended the relationship with her and decided to become a hermit. I felt that I was so deep into the scene that ABGs would have been the only type of girls who "understood" me. Not accepting this learned reality, I chose to not be in any relationships and worked on myself for a year from 2017 - 2018. It was a really dark but enlightening time for me.This included journaling, reading personal development and spending time at the gym. This time, I wanted to be big. Like really big.
I still went to events but it was maybe once a month or so. My use of supplements were reduced as the comedown was becoming too painful to bear.
This is the result of eating 3400 calories, going from 145 to 180. I recall forcing myself to eat the last 600 calories. 2800 seemed to be the "limit" for me but being inexperienced as I was, I stayed in the 1-2lbs/month weight gain range which looking back I DO NOT RECOMMEND FOR ANYBODY. I firmly believe it's much better to be in the 0.25 - 0.5 lbs/month gained to minimize fat gain. I got really fat. There's no way around this. I even wanted to go up all the way to 200!
Hdy flag. Remnants of the fuckboi me.
It wasn't until I met up with my nursing school friends in November 2017 when one of them told me that he hired an online coach to help him get stage ready as he was planning to do a bodybuilding show. He was selling it to me as why it was so important to get a coach:
Takes the guessing work out of training and macros
Better accountability
A new plethora of knowledge
He made tremendous progress in the two months he was being coached. No he wasn't juicing.
I asked him for online coaching recommendations as I wanted to compete just like him. He gave me a few choices but I chose the powerlifting coach because I felt that doing heavy compounds for a few years while having a big total would lay down a solid foundation of muscle. I still plan to compete in bodybuilding, most likely classic physique once I've reached my hit my numbers (405 squat, 315 bench, 500 deadlift). This was the turning point for both my lifting career, career and rave life. I immediately took training and macros very seriously which allowed me to drop from 180 to 145. I transferred to the Emergency room from working in the acute psychiatric ward to challenge myself which turned out well as they wanted me to start on day shift. Going to festivals or events became a rarity.
Give me a break guys. Countdown was fun! I'd rather not be cramped up with people in Vegas or New York....
Me at 145 lbs in 04/2018. It was then I realized I needed MORE MUSCLE.
That year of personal development and figuring my life did wonders for me. Fast forward hundreds of journal entries while having read 30 something books(night shift rocks in the sense that you get a lot of down time) and you have a new you.The main one was understanding that I like nursing but not LOVE it. I LOVE fitness. Being a personal trainer didn't pay the bills for me. I didn't want to live a life not chasing what I really wanted, that is aligning myself with doing things I love, not like or hate. Besides I had all this free time, regenerated brain cells and a new sense of purpose in my life. I chose to no longer squander it on hedonistic pleasures.
As I was getting coached by someone else, I realized, "hey, I think I can really do this online coaching thing." Feeling intrigued, I decided to buy MASS during their black friday sale and attempted to understand sports science. Powerlifting became really interesting to me and I tried to understand as much as I could from it. This meant more Jeff Nippard, Team 3DMJ and a bunch of other Youtubers. It was really nice to have someone so knowledgeable to teach me the basics of biomechanics, programming and nutrition. I filled in the rest of the gap by ferociously devouring everything and anything in sight. Unfortunately, I had to pick up a new coach and I've been with my current one ever since.
In the beginning of 2018, I met my current girlfriend whom we both share our love for fitness and macros. She was the first person who allowed me to practice my online coaching skills. Soon I reached out to my other friends and they happily accepted me as their online coach. This was the budding beginnings of me becoming a coach.
Just like starting anything, the beginning was tough. The diet and nutrition part was fairly easy based on all of my own trial and errors. The hardest part was learning how to program effectively. Once I thought I had a handle on it after asking my "clients," I tinkered on the idea to enter the fitness industry as a reliable, trusted source. If it weren't for my current girlfriend, none of this would exist. 6 months into my coaching career, I asked my current clients for feedback and they all generally agreed that they would have paid for this service. I'm the type of guy who wants to make damn sure that the services he provides are valuable. I told myself to embark on this online fitness personality for 3-5 years and if nothing came to fruition after all that time, then I'd most likely settle and get my MSN.
So now you've got learning how to program, be instafamous, be an effective coach, become competitive, transition into critical care nursing and have a girlfriend. Bet.
A year later I decided to compete. It was such a humbling experience to share with the other competitors. Holy shit they're strong. I ended with a 315 squat, 248 bench and a 335 deadlift. It's shy of 900 lbs total. #itsnotmuchbutitshonestwork #fortherecordmybenchwasthemostcompetitiveliftlol
My girlfriend says I look like a thumb.
I kept posting my big 3 lifts, tried to engage my audience, give out free informative advice, made a bunch of informative IGTV videos and networked with as many people as possible. It would be nice to generate income out of this but first I needed to service my friends and followers with genuine advice. I found it really enjoyable to turn all that jargon into easy, understandable terms. I felt that people needed someone to make sense and connect dots with all the information out there so I felt comfortable fulfilling that role. Besides, it wasn't like I needed the money. Nursing is great in that you have so many days off while being paid pretty handsomely. Besides, I was still working on both my athleticism and coaching prowess so I had no issues keeping my head down, continuing to grind. 1.5 years later, on a whim, I decided to make official on IG that I was accepting actual clients, giving them the first 6 months for half off. Immediately, I picked up a client whom I've connected with prior when he asked me help with macros and weight loss. Mind you, he was a complete stranger who happened to stumble upon my page via the explore feed so I didn't actually know this guy in person. That was how I knew, my dreams are coming true and something is working.
I then picked up an acquaintance from nursing school, and then friends of friends. This is my preferred way of picking up clients but hey, I take what I can get.
I'm still trying to make myself different than the other online coaches. I think I've achieved the bare bones of a competent online coach which, in my opinion are:
Learning how to program optimally for each individual
Learning how to calculate and track macros
Know what the hell you're talking about and why
Here are my own personal unique traits which I try to incorporate:
My soft skills which I've developed over the years as a nurse, especially working with mental health patients.
Help people develop a sharp mindset and great attitude towards not only fitness, but their lives. I've a knack for this from all the reading and personal work I've done to myself.
Change the way people think about fitness. That is, give them correct, sound advice in a very digestible way.
I've still a ways to go from eventually becoming a full time nurse to a full time coach. I'm forever grateful that my client Adam inspired me to make a website and blog. I actually enjoy blogging and for a time I didn't think I was interesting enough. I suppose you'll be the judge of that. Instagram is awesome and all but if people are actually interested in what I have to say, I think reading my blogs will give you a better understanding of who I really am, my humor and all.
With that said, thank you all for reading my story. I hope I've came off as very personable and human. I hope to see you all again and hopefully one day service your needs!
Sincerely,
Joseph L.
Be sure to check out my other blogs with regards to either seeing life a bit more profound or understanding the nuances of fitness deeper. If you loved this article, please support me by sharing it with your friends, liking it and/or dropping a comment!
When you're ready to take your fitness and mental state to the next level, feel free to check out what I have to offer by clicking on this. Spots are limited and the prices will eventually increase as I have more clients so make haste! It would truly be a honor to help you transcend into a stronger version of yourself.
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